Singles

Online Dating Nightmare #1,199

By Melany on April 21, 2014 in Relationships

Hope you all had more fun than I did yesterday. As some of you know, a virus has totally infected AOL in their server. Before, you make some smart-ass comment let me say that I have had AOL since I was 15. It was “MelB” but I hated the spice girls so that was not the premise behind the username. Anyway, I HIGHLY suggest you change passwords and keep up to date with old emails or accounts on websites. For the average person, this is annoying. For me it is a nightmare! Obviously, working in social media means I have… Continue Reading

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Dating & Sex with Patti Stanger & Perez Hilton for Match.com

By Melany on February 12, 2014 in Relationships

As most of you know, I drove to Arizona a few weeks ago for relaxation and to step away from my keyboard. And….I failed miserably at relaxing plus got a speeding ticket along the way. So, not the most fun trip but, I did take part in a discussion with the Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger and Perez Hilton discussing love, dating and sex findings from Match.com 2014 study. The event looked Ah–mazing in New York and I am bummed that I could not actually be at there in RL. However, I was selected to represent the West Coast blogging community… Continue Reading

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Happy New Year 2014: With or Without Resolutions

By Melany on December 31, 2013 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

Happy New Year! Welcome 2014! I am so happy that I am not going to be hung-over, broke, waking up next to a goat or hungry from celebrating getting ripped off on New Years Eve (aka amateur hour). Not sure what the fascination is about going out to celebrate a day in the month of a calendar with 365 days? Yes, I realize that I sound like my parents. Cheers to getting another year older, wiser, and a little bit more in love with my couch. Shouldn’t we celebrate everyday? I know some of you reading this may be drunk,… Continue Reading

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Being Single for the Holidays-Yeah?!

By Melany on December 23, 2013 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

Happy holidays MG fans! Wishing you the most wonderful holiday (whatever holiday it is that you celebrate without offending you). A fellow blogger asked me to write a piece about what it is like being single during the holidays and I know a thing or two about this topic (unfortunately or fortunately). Thanks Karen -for the great topic. This is one of my favorites! In a perfect world I would love to have a kickass companion, boyfriend, mate, or husband along with a perfectly trained dog to spend the holidays with (aren’t they the same? No? Oh). In… Continue Reading

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Thanksgiving 2013 – Thanks & almost full

By Melany on November 28, 2013 in Fans, Snarky

So, it is time for me to write another Thanksgiving post. I can’t believe that I have been writing this blog long enough and with success to be able to do another installment of “What I am thankful for….” 2014 installment. I wish I could say this year has been easy but it has not. I work my ass off everyday on this entertainment thing and am so proud of what I have accomplished. I wish more people would actively support! Every bit helps. Yeah – I am talking to you and YOU! So, like, thumbs up, share, subscribe, and… Continue Reading

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Guys Can be Sloppy Drunky-poo too!

By Melany on November 8, 2013 in Dummies, Snarky

Some things just need a YouTube video and this story is one of them. This is not the correct way to get a date ladies and gentlemen. I would like to set the record straight that girls are not the only people that get sloppy drunk. Guys do too and it is not a good look. Beware of sloppy guys picking up on girls and snarky girls messing with drunky-poo guys while doing so. It was just too fun not to mess with, “blue guy, green, striped guy, plaid guy” and I had to and share with all of you…. Continue Reading

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DatingAdvice.com: Me, An Expert?

By Melany on October 24, 2013 in Relationships

This week has been insane for me but in a great way! This dating and relationship blogosphere is full of information, tips, advice, experts and people who think they are experts. I have learned so much and in no way claim to be an expert but feel that I am heading in that direction (especially when it come to dating this blog and not going on any real dates). What does it mean to be an expert on love and relationships anyway? We all have both of these things (hopefully) in our lives and are full of experiences both good… Continue Reading

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Online Dating: What Not To Do (Again & Again)

By Melany on October 18, 2013 in Relationships

You all know that I have a plethora of online dating nightmare stories and it has not stopped but I have limited my reporting on such ridiculousness because it is depressing quite frankly. This one – I need to get off my chest. Please don’t make these mistakes while online dating or you will end up in the online dating nightmare category, which I should create on this here blog. The following are texts messages from a potential suitor from Sept 22, 2013 – Oct. 10, 2013 that went unanswered by me (I did answer the first week but he… Continue Reading

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The Hollywood Man: Hot, but Not Into Me

By Melany on October 14, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

Just in case you missed my latest YouTube video – here it is! Let me offer you the real perspective on a Hollywood club. They are not the greatest places to meet men unless you are in fact, a man. There are a lot of hot guys but they are either: A. More interested at looking at themselves in the mirror B. More interested at looking at each other It is so frustrating. Oh and BTW – what was the name of that movie where Lily Tomlin is a small person? **Stay snarky my friends!**

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Online Dating Advice: Felony Melany Style

By Melany on October 10, 2013 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

It was a rainy day here in Los Angeles so I decided to play with YouTube a little more. There are so many instructional videos for your instructional video on how to make a YouTube video. They tell you what to do, what not to do, what lighting to use, that you should stand on your head and play a tuba while blowing another bubble out of your ass, wear a donkey suit with a big clown nose down to what to say and what not to say. It is overwhelming to say the least so I just say what… Continue Reading

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Get Seriously Friendly: Say Hello & Grab Yourself a Date

By Melany on October 6, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

It is Rocktober people and I want to encourage you to get back into the dating game this fall. If you are a little rusty let me offer you a “guydline” so that you can break the ice and not look like you are trying too hard. If batting your eyelashes, sticking out your chest, and giving a come hither stare does not work in getting you potential date’s attention then I suggest a few things. Pick a body part that you like and compliment his (get out the gutter ladies) eyes. Tell them they are as blue as… Continue Reading

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Not a Certified Relationship Expert: Going Certifiably Insane Dating!

By Melany on October 4, 2013 in Relationships

Since I started writing this blog, many people ask me so many questions regarding relationships, dating and online dating. I never said I was a certified expert in dating or relationships but I have a hell of a lot of experience in this arena (unfortunately)! I have dated every idiot from the top to the bottom of California (a little in Arizona, Washington, Texas, Florida and New York but who is keeping track?) and am looking for someone to save me from the horrible dating party and online dating predicament I am in! I am not a certified relationship expert… Continue Reading

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