Like a naturally occurring phenomenon, it looks like we have another celebrity meltdown on our hands. The sudden collapse of Amanda Bynes is predictable, yet fascinating. Of course, these things aren’t actually a force of nature, but a product of our perpetual infatuation with stars, particularly those we watch grow up in front of our eyes. Recall your awkward teenage years? Imagine if every day, that stage was under a microscope for snarky housewives to digest like rice cakes. I stumble through cases of writers block without the pressures of constant public attention, so imagine how it must feel to… Continue Reading
one hit wonder
One hit wonder- Dummy Wins Rasta Banana
To most of you, Henry Gribbohm, is not a household name. But this week’s One Hit Wonder spent his entire lifesavings; all $2,600 of it on a game call “Tubs of Fun”. Gribbohm, was trying to win an X-box Kinect, but what this dummy didn’t realize was that he could have bought about 13 Kinects with his so called life savings. Now all this poor soul has to show is a banana with dreadlocks that he seems to take better care of than this 2 year old. I’m trying to figure out what everyone else here is thinking, how does… Continue Reading
Van Halen in Las Vegas: I am with the band
Ah Las Vegas! I have spent many days and nights in my favorite city doing all types of unimaginable things. One of my most memorable “vacays” in sin city was not a vacation at all. When I worked in the illustrious music business, marketing rock bands, I was presented with an offer “to work” a show that I could not refuse. I am talking about Van Halen people. You know who they are, right? Well, one of the first tours I ever had the privilege of working on was Van Halen (not with Diamond Dave but with the Red Rocker… Continue Reading
One hit wonder of the week: Reese Witherspoon
Why, Reese? Why? You had everything. You had a well-deserved title as an all-American girl, the healthiest blonde locks in Hollywood and the best Southern twang I’ve heard in a long time. Then you dyed your hair dirt brown, married a no name and got yourself arrested for being a rude, inconsiderate drunkard. I never thought you’d be on my one hit wonder list, but your behavior earns you a top spot on today’s agenda. I’ll give it to you straight, Reese. I expected better from you. If there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s celebrities who think they’re above… Continue Reading
Bodyguard or Photobomb?
Living in southern California means a lot of things; we do yoga, juice cleanses, we’re ‘sooo chillllll’, but mostly it means that we get to see celebrities on the reg. It’s not unusual to see Justin Bieber speeding around Calabasas or Slash eating sushi at Katsuya. Well a couple weeks ago, I was lucky enough to spot the one and only, disheveled Lindsay Lohan partying at a club in San Diego. The good thing about being in with the industry is knowing the promoters, bouncers and all of the bottle services girls who have the inside scoop. I was out… Continue Reading
Foo Fighters: Wins for no talent, bad chops, & worst band name ever!
I was not impressed or excited to hear that Dave Grohl was talking and playing SXSW in Austin, which is one of the biggest music festivals of the year. I just don’t get it. The rock n’ roll community needs to step up and embrace real musicians and good music. Just wander into any bar in Austin, and I guarantee you will find more talent than the Foo Fighters. I saw a girl weighing 95 lbs (soaking wet) rock a bar and schlep a bass around the perimeter for hours during her set. She sang too (and well). Or, what… Continue Reading
Rock! Rock! Til You Drop
The week of Passover and Easter is upon us and I really need some rock n’ roll in my life right now. That ALWAYS seems to (almost) cure feelings of disappointment in the people and situations around me. This year is no different; it is TIME to go back to Las Vegas for Def Leppard in my ears and rock in my veins. One thing is for sure; they were no one hit wonder! (more…) **Stay snarky my friends!**
American Idol: Nicki Minaj or Fran Drescher’s “The Nanny”
I can barely watch American Idol this year. Just listening to Nikki Minaj’s voice makes me want to jump out my window. The show with Fran Drescher, The Nanny– yeah, that is what Nikki sounds like. Since when does she have the proper credentials to judge someone on their singing voice when she can’t sing (or speak in a somewhat tolerable voice?) One hit wonder is more like it! She should stick to creating edible hair and using Crayolas to draw on her face. (more…) **Stay snarky my friends!**
One Hit Wonder Rihanna: Former musician, queen of shitty Instagram and slutty runway shows
Close your eyes and try to remember the first time you heard Rihanna and didn’t get her confused with some cookie-cutter American transplant pop stars (whether or not you have working ears and a halfway decent taste in music is beside the point, but I will judge you regardless). **Stay snarky my friends!**
Melanysguydlines 2.0 Oscar Style -All snark, all true. One hit wonder too!
You all already know me from melanysguydlines.com but I thought it was about time that I step out from behind my avatar’s shadow and introduce the REAL Mel G and Teddy B. (more…) **Stay snarky my friends!**