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Snarky

Put That Phone Down!!!

Nothing like deleting 7,500 of 44,572 photos for 2 hours from my phone to realize: 1. How many selfies it takes to get a sharable melfie. What a waste of time. 2. How many dumb asses I have dated. All of them…. but it’s a learning experience, right? 3. How many “emotional vampires” I have known, dumped and how many I still need to get rid of (Thanks Steph for the perfect term). Cleaning house feels so good. 4. How bad shopping is online and that nothing ever looks the same once you order and try it on at home…. Continue Reading

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My Havanese Dog Vs. Owl Scarecrow

Havanese Dog Vs. Owl Scarecrow

HOO HOO HOO Hello. Is this thing on? It has been a little while and I am squeezing in this post in the middle of the most chaotic 6 months of my life because I have to share. As most of you know, Teddy Brewski (my Havanese) and I live in Arizona. He is never without me on the other end of a leash outside. Who is walking whom, is debatable but that is beside the point. Anyway, there are so many wild animals in Phoenix and I have named them all in hopes that they will play nicely but… Continue Reading

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All American Pet Photo Day

#AllAmericanPetPhotoDay I had to share this adorable image of my pupper Teddy Brewski on this here blog because it is too cute! Plus, he is first team all American in my book every single day. Thank you to 12 News in Arizona for recognizing patriotic pups like mine and sharing this image on the @12NewsAZ social media channels. Follow him… Continue Reading

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Life Isn’t Always A Beach

1. Don’t judge someone’s life by what you see online – it is just a sizzle real 2. Don’t DM me if you want a response in near future or ever. Text me. 3. If you disappear or I cut you out- don’t try to come back. I don’t do reunion tours 4. If you reach out to me, begin with common courtesy aka manners like… “how are you” before asking me for something and if I have to tell you this the answer is always “no” !!!! 5. Think before you speak, act or react. Please. Actually just THINK… Continue Reading

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University of Arizona: New Media In The Classroom

Happy 2019! Can you believe it is 2019? I can’t. My 2018 calendar was filled with so many exciting events and opportunities. Can’t wait to see what is in store this year for MelanysGuydlines. One event that I had the pleasure of organizing and speaking at was held at the beautiful Mountain Shadows Resort in Paradise Valley, Arizona. We wanted to rally the University of Arizona alumni living in the Phoenix area and showcase what is new in education at the UofA! There is a lot going on and we wanted the opportunity to share and get more alumni excited… Continue Reading

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New Years Resolutions Are Lame: Snarky Guydlines Are Forever 2019

As I sit here on the eve of 2019, I take time to review my past New Years Eve posts full “guydlines-isms” and it is not surprising that I agree with 100% of what I have had to say in the past. I told you many times I am smarter than I look. Right? This year is no different.  It is time for us to ring in another year and I am very excited and optimistic for 2019 because it has to be better than 2018 and hope that I don’t repeat mistakes of the past. Like I always say,… Continue Reading

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Happy Holidays & Pawlidays 2018

Happy Holidays and Pawlidays from Teddy Brewski and his assistant a.k.a. Melany from MelanysGuydlines. We wanted to wish you a very happy holiday season full of happiness and health!! Be good to one another! PLEASE 🙂 Here is a throwback of the Teddy Brewski because it is just too darn cute not to repost and who doesn’t like a dog in a Santa Hat? I know I do! Thank you for following both of us and cheers to an even better 2019. SNARK ON and ROCK ON! May the snark be with you – ALWAYS! **Stay snarky my friends!**

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I Am Most Thankful For…..REMIX Thanksgiving 2018

Happy Thanksgiving! This post is a classic remix from when I first started this blog in 2012! It gave me a LOL! Feel free to add to it in the comments. I am THANKFUL for: Being raised by the 2 most amazing people who have been supportive through all my 9 lives and taught me never to be scared of my own shadow. Being blessed to have had a sister that I shared everything with and knowing that she is watching over me every day. Having the strength to kick ass literally and figuratively. Puppies. All of them, especially Teddy… Continue Reading

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Interview: Conversations With Melany Berger Via VoyagePhoenix

Interview: Conversations With Melany Berger Via VoyagePhoenix

Thank you to VoyagePhoenix Magazine for interviewing me for their feature as a top Trailblazer/Influencer in Scottsdale. Honest and real answers about what make me who I am, where I came from, inspirations, what I have overcome and an all around really informative interview for friends, family and followers. Some of you might know and most of you don’t! You have never walked a day in my shoes and I have not walked a day in yours but this gives a glimpse of moi. Enjoy! Can you briefly walk us through your story – how you started and how you… Continue Reading

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Retail Therapy Is Causing Me To Need Therapy

Retail Therapy Is Causing Me To Need Therapy

Remember the days when you could walk into a store and shop for things that were actually in the store? You didn’t have to ask for a size and have the retail associate tell you to order it online. If I wanted to sit at home and buy these ugly styles from the comfort of my own home, I would. I came to this store to see and try on these drapes, I mean, clothes. I want to see them, feel them and try them on so that I could decide if it looks like I am wearing my grandmother’s… Continue Reading

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Rosé All Day For My Birthday

Rosé All Day For My Birthday

Well, here we are. June 12, 2018 and another year in the books! I usually say it is my 30 ‘ish ‘ish Birthday but this year it is the 30’st as in the most a.k.a. best 30-something Birthday ever! It has been a wild year full of way too much stress and weird experiences. Like I always say “ I am flytrap for stupid people” and this year was no exception. Let’s hope I am losing some of that stickiness this year. Please! There is only so much snark one person can share. Seriously! THIS year I need to recite… Continue Reading

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