guydlines

Do-Do’s & Don’ts of Dating: Don’t Pee On My Parade

By Melany on June 3, 2014 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

Since I did win in the Sex, Dating and Relationships category yesterday I thought I would share with you a funny ditty. Here goes…. You know how bad and non-existent dating is in the city of angels because I have told you over and over again. So, why not import someone? I did just that with my last tour mate. He hailed from the desert and we had known each other for quite sometime so I thought that this could be a real keeper until our last rendez vous ended in disaster somewhere between the Boulevard of Broken Dreams and… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 33

Bad Ass Blog Award – Sex, Dating & Relationship WINNER 2014: MelanysGuydlines

By Melany on June 2, 2014 in Relationships

Happy Birthday to me 10 days early! MelanysGuydlines was nominated and won The 2014 Badass Blog Award in the Sex, Dating and Relationships category! Thank you to all that read, support and voted for me. I really appreciate it and happy that my hard work is being recognized on such an awesome platform. It is even sweeter to know that I was voted on by peers and fans alike with thousands of nominations flooding the Indie Chicks website. Here is my badge! I am going to sport this loud and proud. Wouldn’t you? It was a good race… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 26

I’m a Rockstar: Bad Ass Blog Awards Finalist & Billboard Music Awards 2014

By Melany on May 18, 2014 in Snarky

It is so ironic. Every time I am in Las Vegas to try and get some vacation –y time – this here blog is up for an award. I am so honored!!!! Hope I win this one as the title of the award is so fitting for the snarky goodness shared on this website. I was in Las Vegas during the Forbes Top 100 Female websites, Shorty Awards race and now have been selected as a finalist for the Bad Ass Blog Awards in the Best Sex, Dating and Relationship Blog. Thank you for the nominations that helped me advance… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 10

Getting A Second Date: The Real Truth Part 2

By Melany on May 5, 2014 in Relationships

And without further ado…..PART 2 to Getting A Second Date: The Real Truth. If you did not read PART 1 – you should! 4. Manners/Doesn’t Know Shit/Full of Shit -She thinks that if she is indecisive and acts like she doesn’t know what to order while at dinner that it makes her date feel more like a man and being courteous to his wallet. Unfortunately, the only thing this does is annoy him and makes him want to jump out the nearest window (which is nearby their “best” table he has so cleverly arranged with the host while being early)…. Continue Reading

Continue Reading 10

Getting a Second Date: The Real Truth

By Melany on April 28, 2014 in Relationships

So, you want to know how to get a second date? Before you can “want” a second date you need to successfully survive and impress on the first one, right? I am willing to bet that no one willingly goes out on first dates just to go on one date. First dates are awkward no matter how drunk you get (and that could lead to a more awkward second date but that is a different post). They are by far one of the most uncomfortable situations so it is fair to assume most of us go on a first… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 10

16 Things Not To Do At (Any/Social Media) Conference

By Melany on April 2, 2014 in Greatest Hits, Snarky

1. Not knowing your competition. Know if anyone is dominating your niche in the market. I am 70% sure there may be someone doing what you think you have created. Can’t you hear Drunk Uncle from SNL saying “I’m prrrrrrrreetttttyyyy suuuuuurrrrrree…..” someone is already doing that? Do your research! 2. Do not wear high heels during the day so you look like a wounded stork walking through the hotel. This will make people notice you but not in a good way and then you can’t attend the rest of the conference and have to call in wounded the second day…. Continue Reading

Continue Reading 22

Insomnia: Top 12 Things (NOT) To Do When I Can’t Sleep

By Melany on March 7, 2014 in Greatest Hits, Snarky

Just woke up with a start and was thinking how can I write a blog post at 3:00AM without it sounding weird. Well, that already sounds weird so here is a list of the top things I do when abruptly interrupted from my much needed beauty rest. (Please note all of these are done while tip-toeing as not to wake up my sleeping beauty AKA – Teddy Brewski because once he starts barking, he will NEVER stop. Dogs don’t have internal alarm clocks. We are their clocks). 1. Pee- Don’t you? Usually the reason I wake up in the middle… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 16

When Animals Attack: Dating Interference

By Melany on February 19, 2014 in Relationships

The Shorty Awards nominations are over and I hope I did not miss the honor by one spot. I will be ok with it (I will not, but my vodka is chilling and ready for consumption at 4:59PM to soothe my soul -just in case). Stay tuned as they are calculating right NOW! If I did not win, I am convinced outside forces in which I had no control over affected the outcome. Animals. You know? When animals attack? In the past week, I had interference from all of the following “animals”, which prevented proper promoting, blogging, (and successful… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 4

Dating & Sex with Patti Stanger & Perez Hilton for Match.com

By Melany on February 12, 2014 in Relationships

As most of you know, I drove to Arizona a few weeks ago for relaxation and to step away from my keyboard. And….I failed miserably at relaxing plus got a speeding ticket along the way. So, not the most fun trip but, I did take part in a discussion with the Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger and Perez Hilton discussing love, dating and sex findings from Match.com 2014 study. The event looked Ah–mazing in New York and I am bummed that I could not actually be at there in RL. However, I was selected to represent the West Coast blogging community… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 6

Grammys: Sink or Swim?

By Melany on January 26, 2014 in LALA Land, Snarky

I wake up this morning and am super pissed that I don’t have a Master Card in my wallet. Actually, I am also a little irritated with my wallet staying out all weekend at a friend’s house. I left my wallet there on Thursday and have been confined to the house and sustaining on left over Halloween candy since I have no MONEY to buy any food. It is ok but I am going to be pissed if I can’t fit into my outfit for tonight. Oh that is right? A pair of tickets to the Grammys, preshow and after… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 12

Happy New Year 2014: With or Without Resolutions

By Melany on December 31, 2013 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

Happy New Year! Welcome 2014! I am so happy that I am not going to be hung-over, broke, waking up next to a goat or hungry from celebrating getting ripped off on New Years Eve (aka amateur hour). Not sure what the fascination is about going out to celebrate a day in the month of a calendar with 365 days? Yes, I realize that I sound like my parents. Cheers to getting another year older, wiser, and a little bit more in love with my couch. Shouldn’t we celebrate everyday? I know some of you reading this may be drunk,… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 22

Color Me Bad: Naughty or Nice

By Melany on December 5, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

Hello MG fans. So, I have been slammed since my return from Arizona and the holiday season madness. I am doing my best to catch up with publicist requests, tinder matches (separate blog post for this and there are more perverts to be discovered every day), training Teddy Brewski, thinking of YouTube videos for your viewing pleasure, not eating the entire house, and needing a wheelbarrow to go to the gym. As I have mentioned to you in the past, I will only write about things publicists send me that I find interesting and funny. About a month ago, two… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 2

← Previous 1 … 7 8 9 10 Next →

Top

Subscribe!

guydlines