Getting a Second Date: The Real Truth


GETTING  a second date: the real truth

So, you want to know how to get a second date? Before you can “want” a second date you need to successfully survive and impress on the first one, right? I am willing to bet that no one willingly goes out on first dates just to go on one date. First dates are awkward no matter how drunk you get (and that could lead to a more awkward second date but that is a different post). They are by far one of the most uncomfortable situations so it is fair to assume most of us go on a first date in hopes of meeting a person worthy enough to want a follow up date. There are no sure fire ways of getting a date but one thing is for sure, men and women digest and interpret things very differently. For example, take some of the most common steps men and women follow while dating and how each of them interprets the situation. Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus (or Pluto depending on the woman or man involved).

1. Preparation/Googling/ Spying

-A woman meets a man and he actually calls her and they set up a date.  Her logical next move is to Google the shit out of his name to make sure he does not have any felonies and is not pictured alongside a different bleach blonde, bandage-dress wearing, MAC-makeup-piling flavor of the week in his pictures on Facebook. If his legal record comes up clean (MIP’s don’t count) and he seems to have a somewhat normal life including a profession that can be easily explained and referenced on the web, then he already has points for the second date in her eyes.

-For a Man, his Googling experience is a little different because what he really cares about is if she has good-looking friends and that she looks “do-able” in her pictures. This is important so that he can show her off to his buddies prior to spending his paycheck on her. If she looks “hot” then she is good to go in the second date prospective category.

2. Primping/ Costumes/Face Painting

-When a female gets ready for a date with a possible suitor, she wants to make sure she is waxed, painted and toned in all the right places. To show off her hard work she will need the appropriate attire to impress her future prince charming so she opts for the LBD.  The length and fit of her dress are important to show off her natural (and paid for) assets. After she decides on the shortest one, she gets her makeup done and hair blown out at the dry bar and thinks she looks hot and ready to meet Mr. Right. She is sucked in, blown out, and ready to rock, right? Wrong! This could leave him wondering if he ordered his date online or from a 1-800 number. He is also wondering what the hell she would look like the morning after her clown makeup fades.

-When a guy gets ready he chooses something that looks cool but not too cool like a dress jacket, jeans, V-neck shirt barely showing the tattoo of his college mascots tail peaking out the right sleeve, paired with sparkling white tennis shoes. His choice to wear this to a 4 or 5 star restaurant leaves a woman questioning if she is going on a date with Justin Bieber or a quality man who can actually speak without mentioning the word “YOLO” in reference to his lame tattoo.

3. Timing/Too Late/Too Early

-A woman thinks that if she is 15 minutes late that it creates anticipation for the date as if she is walking down some imaginary red carpet for her big reveal. A man thinks it is rude and wonders how the hell she could ever be ready to go on that spur of the moment trip to a luau in Maui without ample time to put on a face of makeup which will melt off while sitting next to a roasting pig on the firepit.

-A guy may think it is a good idea to be super early for a date, get the name and number of the host and ensure the best table in the house for the evening. But, this says to the woman that the guy has no life and that this date is the most grandiose event in his life next to his Bar Mitzah or getting his Masters from the Desperation School of hard knocks.


**Stay snarky my friends!**

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10 Responses to Getting a Second Date: The Real Truth

  1. Jamie April 28, 2014 at 9:43 pm #

    I have the feeling the guy I met couldn’t handle the truth. Ha,ha

    • Melany April 29, 2014 at 9:26 am #

      I agree – sadly 🙁

  2. miguel nolasco April 30, 2014 at 7:00 pm #

    Ha ha !!! Melany thanks for the info .I will use this in the Future . Peace

    • Melany May 1, 2014 at 9:04 am #

      Ok —wait because there is a part 2!

  3. Meena Avery May 1, 2014 at 11:44 am #

    Great advice! I’ll definitely keep it all in mind next time!

    • Melany May 1, 2014 at 3:05 pm #

      Thanks….there is another part! Stay tuned…

  4. Q May 1, 2014 at 7:14 pm #

    I’m cool with a woman being a little late, but if she’s a lot late then it can rub me the wrong way. I’ve yet to have a reason to Google someone since I was married when the Googling boom took place and afterwards I’ve only been with people I’m familiar with.

    • Melany May 1, 2014 at 11:20 pm #

      I am so thankful for GOOGLE!

  5. Single Dating Diva May 3, 2014 at 2:30 pm #

    Great tips and insight! It’s always good to see things from both the man & woman’s perspective because we really do see things differently and have different motivations. I’m always on time for dates and always put my best foot forward, that, and a fun time, great conversation, definitely are a successful recipe for a second date!

    • Melany May 5, 2014 at 9:23 am #

      Well- read the second part and then tell me what you think! LOL

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