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Dear Spoiled Americans,

By on March 19, 2020 in Greatest Hits, Relationships

Dear Spoiled Americans, This is for you! The Coronavirus is affecting every, single one of us. You are not the only one. Ok? So, let’s get that straight. Someone has it worse than you and you need to remember that. It is really easy to be a keyboard warrior while there are real people doing their JOBS going above and beyond to protect you, the ungrateful. They are risking their own lives daily so you can sit from the comfort of your own home, in your pajamas, eating cookies, with your family and complain that you are able to work… Continue Reading

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Puppies Make Me Happy: Meet Mr. December aka Teddy Brewski

By on January 13, 2020 in Goodies, Greatest Hits

The Snuggle Is Real! Puppies make me very happy but so does that fact that YOU voted for my puppy, Teddy Brewski to be in the 2020 Puppies Make Me Happy Calendar. He is Mr. December and his caption reads “The Snuggle is Real” and fits him to a tee. We have had a ruff 2019 but the fact that over 600 votes were counted from YOU (real people with a pulse) for the snarkiest Havanese, makes this New Year much sweeter. Teddy Brewski and I wish all of you a fabulous 2020. May this be the best year yet!… Continue Reading

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Right Foot First Into 2020

By on January 1, 2020 in Relationships
You can’t reach your goals for the future if you have one foot still chained to the past!!!!

You can’t reach your goals for the future if you have one foot still chained to the past!!!! No looking back. Follow me in moving forward with the RIGHT foot first into 2020! Wishing all of you a happy and healthy new year. To quote one of my followers on Instagram: @gregaltmeyer ” There is a reason why the windshield is large and the rear view mirror is small! Here’s to your best year yet!“ Lots of love always, Melany and Teddy Brewski a.k.a. Mr. December. You can’t reach your goals for the future if you have one foot still… Continue Reading

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Rosh Hashanah: Spiritual Healing Begins From Within

By on September 29, 2019 in Relationships

To all my family and friends who observe, wishing you a very happy and sweet Rosh Hashanah. During the commencement of the Jewish New Year let this first night begin a spiritual journey of introspection and repentance. Let us sit quietly for a moment away from our electronics and focus on ourselves. Spiritual healing and forgiveness must begin from within. From there we may then ask ….. To those I may have wronged…..I ask for forgiveness. To those I may have helped….I wish I had done more. To those I may have neglected to help….I ask for understanding. To those… Continue Reading

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Put That Phone Down!!!

By on September 21, 2019 in Relationships, Snarky

Nothing like deleting 7,500 of 44,572 photos for 2 hours from my phone to realize: 1. How many selfies it takes to get a sharable melfie. What a waste of time. 2. How many dumb asses I have dated. All of them…. but it’s a learning experience, right? 3. How many “emotional vampires” I have known, dumped and how many I still need to get rid of (Thanks Steph for the perfect term). Cleaning house feels so good. 4. How bad shopping is online and that nothing ever looks the same once you order and try it on at home…. Continue Reading

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My Havanese Dog Vs. Owl Scarecrow

By on August 9, 2019 in Snarky
Havanese Dog Vs. Owl Scarecrow

HOO HOO HOO Hello. Is this thing on? It has been a little while and I am squeezing in this post in the middle of the most chaotic 6 months of my life because I have to share. As most of you know, Teddy Brewski (my Havanese) and I live in Arizona. He is never without me on the other end of a leash outside. Who is walking whom, is debatable but that is beside the point. Anyway, there are so many wild animals in Phoenix and I have named them all in hopes that they will play nicely but… Continue Reading

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All American Pet Photo Day

By on July 12, 2019 in Snarky

#AllAmericanPetPhotoDay I had to share this adorable image of my pupper Teddy Brewski on this here blog because it is too cute! Plus, he is first team all American in my book every single day. Thank you to 12 News in Arizona for recognizing patriotic pups like mine and sharing this image on the @12NewsAZ social media channels. Follow him… Continue Reading

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Life Isn’t Always A Beach

By on July 10, 2019 in Snarky

1. Don’t judge someone’s life by what you see online – it is just a sizzle real 2. Don’t DM me if you want a response in near future or ever. Text me. 3. If you disappear or I cut you out- don’t try to come back. I don’t do reunion tours 4. If you reach out to me, begin with common courtesy aka manners like… “how are you” before asking me for something and if I have to tell you this the answer is always “no” !!!! 5. Think before you speak, act or react. Please. Actually just THINK… Continue Reading

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#SephoraSquad: Beauty Influencer For Sephora Love Needed

By on March 4, 2019 in Goodies

Happy Monday beautiful people. I am sitting down this sunny morning to tackle 2000 emails in my Inbox but wanted to take a moment to ask you for a minute of your time. I was invited to be a part of the brand new influencer #SephoraSquad for Sephora via Fohr.co and I need YOUR help!! I use products from Sephora every single day! From intense workout days without makeup to a night rocking out at a concert loud and proud with high hair and a lot of eye makeup! Remember, the higher the hair the closer your seats are to… Continue Reading

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FabFitFun Describes Me To A Tee: Proud To Be A #FabFitFunPartner

By on January 22, 2019 in Goodies

FabFitFun describes me to a tee (heehee) and proud to be a #fabfitfunpartner !!! The FabFitFun box is an amazing value! Each box is filled with FULL size products from only the best brands. They are having the biggest sale ever right now with 40% off your first box by using my code “MB”. FabFitFun always brings you the latest and greatest in FULL-size beauty, fashion, fitness, and lifestyle goodies valued at well over $200! Seriously! No little bottles and mini items ever. Check out the Winter Editor’s Box they sent me, which supports the Kindness Factory encouraging acts of… Continue Reading

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University of Arizona: New Media In The Classroom

By on January 7, 2019 in Goodies, Snarky

Happy 2019! Can you believe it is 2019? I can’t. My 2018 calendar was filled with so many exciting events and opportunities. Can’t wait to see what is in store this year for MelanysGuydlines. One event that I had the pleasure of organizing and speaking at was held at the beautiful Mountain Shadows Resort in Paradise Valley, Arizona. We wanted to rally the University of Arizona alumni living in the Phoenix area and showcase what is new in education at the UofA! There is a lot going on and we wanted the opportunity to share and get more alumni excited… Continue Reading

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New Years Resolutions Are Lame: Snarky Guydlines Are Forever 2019

By on December 31, 2018 in Relationships, Snarky

As I sit here on the eve of 2019, I take time to review my past New Years Eve posts full “guydlines-isms” and it is not surprising that I agree with 100% of what I have had to say in the past. I told you many times I am smarter than I look. Right? This year is no different.  It is time for us to ring in another year and I am very excited and optimistic for 2019 because it has to be better than 2018 and hope that I don’t repeat mistakes of the past. Like I always say,… Continue Reading

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