Top

Subscribe!

contests

Cupids Bullseye: $545 Exclusive ICJUK Giveaway

By on February 3, 2014 in Goodies

Happy pre-Valentines Day (another- Don’t dress like a slut day). If you heard my interview on The Modern Dater, then you know I don’t love this holiday. It is not because I am single and bitter because when I had a hot boyfriend – I hated the holiday. You can ask him? He is probably still sitting in the same chair, with the same shocked looked on his face when I left him at a five star restaurant some years back. People – we do not need Hallmark to tell each other when we should be nice. It should happen… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 184

$200 RETRO BRAND Gear Giveaway!

By on January 17, 2014 in Goodies

Exciting news today! So, you all know that I am a rocker, love college basketball (especially my #1 Arizona Wildcats), pop-culture, baseball and beer! That is a given. For a while now, I have been a HUGE fan of a clothing company that was created by a fellow University of Arizona Wildcat alumnus, Marc Herman. Marc’s company, Retro Brand produces KICK ASS gear for snarky people like you and me! Retro Brand and Melanysguydlines are giving you the chance to win $200 buckeroos to buy whatever your little heart desires on their site!  THIS IS AWESOME! I have a bunch… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 179

Bye Cold But, I’m Keeping the Funny, Sexy Voice!

By on January 15, 2014 in Relationships
Prince charming is living with mr right

I am back from Vegas and have a cold. It is not fantastic because I am still hungry but can’t taste anything so forget about losing weight while sitting here with my thumb up my ass.  It is not awesomely dehydrating like the stomach flu where you magically lose 5 pounds. It is more like I am bloated like a puffer fish from the sodium in soup I have been ordering from the local LA Delicatessens. At least I have been able to catch up on taxes, which may actually be the worst thing in life besides moving or a… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 4

Bitch on Plane & Graziano Mob Wives Meat Cleavers?

By on January 10, 2014 in Relationships
get off cell phone

Follow my blog with Bloglovin Hello, hello! I am back in LALAland and just in time to rock out to some 80’s rock n’ roll tonight! Stephen Pearcy from Ratt and roll is playing at the Whisky and how could I miss it? Well I am not! I lucked out and jumped on an earlier plane yesterday so that I could get home and apply all the new social media and blogging knowledge to this blog! Of course, I had a lady on my plane who thought that she was the only person on the aircraft. She was no Alec… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 8

WIN Beats by Dre Wireless Headphones

By on January 3, 2014 in Goodies

Greetings from Las Vegas! I am here in sin city getting my blogging nerd on but did not forget about my favorite people! I asked, you replied and I listened for what you wanted most for the next giveaway. And without further adieu… A little birdy gave me wireless headphones – aka “Beats by Dre” and they are amazing if I do say so myself. Color black and so fantastic. All the controls are from the headset and they are yours to win and rock like a champ. You know how much I love my music and this is a… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 160

Happy Holidays, Congrats & Giveaways for 2014!

By on December 27, 2013 in Goodies
happy holidays and congrats

Happy “weird days between Christmas and New Years Day where no one is really working” and I missed the memo! I just realized that I have been working for the last two hours without the sweet tunes of Tesla or Ratt in my ears so I am going to make this short and sweet (like Teddy Brewski and I). Congratulations to Laurel from WA! She is the winner of the Kindle Fire HD! I am so stoked for her! Thank you to EVERYONE who entered, supported, commented, liked, followed, and rocked this contest! I am on my way to send… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 4

Back in LALAland: Hollyweird

By on December 11, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

While you are reading this, there is a good possibility that I am still waiting for YouTube to upload a 5 minute video. You would think in this day and age I would just have to clap and it would be uploaded. You know like the clapper? Clap on, clap off. WTF is going on here? So, while I wait for one of the most painful experiences in life (waiting for a telephone/internet/cable repair man to show up and fix something properly the first time) you are going to have to watch this video I snuck through the internet waves… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 8

Las Vegas -Insider Track to a Half a Piece of Pie

By on August 5, 2013 in Fans, Snarky
las vegas hangover shirt

Last week was a crazy week for melanysguydlines.com. Facebook and Twitter were on fire! I am so excited to announce that we hit 8100 followers @Melanyb12 and Facebook #8300 likes and counting! If you don’t go there – you should! Also, it was very cool to hear people talking and spreading the word (even if some of my friends are still slow on the go – they will learn or maybe not? I am still looking for a place to return friends. Do you know where I can do that?) On top of all of that, I was asked to… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 5

Are you a video star? Enter for your chance to win up to $15,000 in CASH!

By on June 24, 2013 in Goodies

I get a lot of weird PR requests for the blog, Twitter and Facebook and it takes me a long time to go through all of them. Some of them are just ridiculous. Seriously –I will revisit this at another time. Talking about getting requests regarding topics like Hitler, aliens, fat burning wraps, bullying, depression, mental illness and so much more. I mean – do these PR people read my blog? Not snarky and not humorous topics. Do your research PR people. But, no matter how weird the request are I pride myself on replying to each and every one… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 2

Create a Match.com Summer Singles Event & WIN – CONTEST

By on May 13, 2013 in Goodies

You know how much melanysguydlines.com loves giving away free stuff! So, here is another opportunity for you! I am so excited to have been asked to promote the one- year anniversary Stir Events by Match.com contest “What stirs you? Create a Match.com Summer Singles Event and Win” opportunity! Wow – that is a long title, but do you know what that means? It means that you have the chance to celebrate Stir’s successful singles events by entering to win the prospect of being an event planner for the day and create the most amazing singles event for eligible men and… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 0

Congratulations to Alison Maria aka relation_shits

By on May 13, 2013 in Goodies

CONGRATULATIONS to our winner of the Las Vegas contest! She really hit the Jackpot!! I love her snarky attitude and appreciate her entry! Thank you so much. I am pleased to announce the following person has won a long and hard fight for the amazing Las Vegas weekend prize. Help me congratulate – Alison Maria aka @relation_shits from Twitter!! Here is the winning/snarky/humorous #guydline: Always ending up with the brides bouquets but never the man. Flowers, those are easy to catch. Guys, not so much… (49%, 321 Votes) Thank you so much for your participation and I wish you lots… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 0

Van Halen in Las Vegas: I am with the band

By on April 29, 2013 in Music Biz, Snarky

Ah Las Vegas! I have spent many days and nights in my favorite city doing all types of unimaginable things. One of my most memorable “vacays” in sin city was not a vacation at all. When I worked in the illustrious music business, marketing rock bands, I was presented with an offer “to work” a show that I could not refuse. I am talking about Van Halen people. You know who they are, right? Well, one of the first tours I ever had the privilege of working on was Van Halen (not with Diamond Dave but with the Red Rocker… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 0