I have always marched to the beat of my own drum and never felt the need to be like everyone else. I am an independent thinker, but lately feel like an alien while navigating the outside world and scrolling through social media. The pandemic lockdown was rough, and people had issues before, but Covid exacerbated them. I feel like I can’t relate to people on any level. When did some of this behavior become the norm?
I have so many questions and observations (and can’t wrap my head around a lot of things), so I am just going to spit them out, in no particular order.
You could call this Melany’s Mutterings:
How can you be obsessed with everything? Yes, you might like something a lot but “obsessed” is a little dramatic, don’t you think? How am I supposed to distinguish from all of your “obsessions” which one you actually like the best? There are many other words in the English language that might be better suited to describe your likes and dislikes.
What in the hell am I watching right now? Is this entertainment or torture because I can’t tell.
We all know that is not what you look like or are you that blurry in real life?
How can everything be “unprecedented” now? Definition: “Unprecedented- never done or known before”. Period.
Just because they are wearing it doesn’t mean you should too.
Why do you have a mask on in your profile picture? Would you wear that in your driver’s license picture? Actually, leave it on so I know which one of you to ignore.
Do not mistake my friend request acceptance as an invite to my DM’s. STOP IT.
Why don’t you need a license to have children? It would weed out all the stupid people who should not be having them and at least give us a fighting chance for future generations raised by good parents.
Stop it with the semantics. I will always win in a war with words and you need a dictionary.
Do people know that they should check BOTH the front and back in the mirror? Wonder if they know they can and should do that?
Certain things are too much, like your lips, hair, butt and those eyelashes that look like a spider died on your face. If you look like your eyes are closed with eyelashes on, they are not working for you. Eyebrows and eyelashes shouldn’t look like they are going to attack me or be listed on insect repellent bottles.
Yes, you should wear clothing that actually covers the crease above your thighs aka your butt and your entire breast. If the fabric does not cover these areas, this means the clothing is too small and we all know it.
Guys in tight pants, that is way too much information and I never asked for it.
Please and thank you are important words. Try them. Please and thank you.
Choose your words wisely because there is no edit button in real life.
It is called a conversation not a dissertation. If you never ask how I am doing then why expect me to care about you.
Parents, if your kids are running the show- YOU ARE DOING IT WRONG.
You can’t blame your parents forever. At a certain time – take responsibility. You can’t have it both ways.
Stop putting your children on social media. They are not your meal ticket.
Please get a job because parenting isn’t something you are doing well.
What you post on social media is forever. So, make sure it won’t embarrass you or your parents. That is a crucial guydline for everyone to know. I don’t care your age, race, or gender but it is forever like those tattoos.
If you are not old enough to actually buy your phone you should not be posting those videos. Trust me and put some clothes on.
Customer service. Does this exist anymore?
Do news anchors interview people first before they get on the air? They should because I can’t get that 2 minutes of my life back.
It is not just good enough. Does anyone have pride in their name or work anymore?
Yes, I am paying you so please do your work correctly the first time. You work, do it correctly and earn your money. You are not entitled to a damn thing.
Politeness never goes out of style. NEVER. EVER.
We can agree to disagree. That is still allowed right?
Jealousy is not a good color on anyone. It is so loud it’s blinding me.
Fakeness exhausts me and you are so bad at it.
Emotional vampires are real. If you only make withdrawals and never deposits into our relationship, then I withdraw completely.
Plans with me are never STABO (Subject To A Better Offer).
If you are always waiting for the next best offer, you will miss the best option in front of your face. Taking a little from everywhere leaves you with nothing. Committing and being dependable are good traits.
Is your memory that short or highly selective?
When did we become a “me” generation that is so self-involved and oblivious of others?
If you think this is about you, it might just be so take a good hard look at yourself.
You can’t live your life in neutral. When did settling for things become the norm?
What number am I on because I know at least 3 of you are counting?
…..And what the hell am I listening to?
**Stay snarky my friends!**