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How to Party Like a Surfer: Don’t Yell & Leave Your Shoes At Home

By on July 29, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

Last weekend, I got a sudden urge and decided to pack (way too much and the problem with that, is unpacking sucks) put Teddy Brewski with his friends at day/night camp (I swear he has more friends than I do) and drive down to Huntington Beach for the US Open of Surfing. No one told me that I should not leave LA proper after 2:00PM because it would take me two and a half hours to get to the beach in traffic. But, so what? I am a great DJ and I knew there were clean beaches, sun, and surfers… Continue Reading

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Zynga Sparks Relationships by Gaming

By on July 23, 2013 in Relationships
zynga sparks relationships by gaming marriage proposal

When I was younger, I used to play games all the time and always had boyfriends or involved in a dating relationship. I had funny relationship advice and relationships stories of some kind because I was always in a relationship! Now, I seem to have bad dating stories or online dating horror stories. Being young and finding potential dates was much easier than it is today. If I wasn’t competing in sports outside hitting or kicking balls, you could find me inside dribbling or volleying other types of balls. All the best looking guys played sports too. I do have… Continue Reading

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Rolling Stone: Selling or Selling Out?

By on July 19, 2013 in Music Biz, Snarky
rolling stone magazine selling out

Rolling Stone magazine depicting the Boston marathon terrorist as a Rock star by giving him the cover is so un-American and definitely un-rock n’ roll. That cover is a coveted spot where kids and adults of all ages with a guitar, bass, mic or drumsticks, dream to obtain that honor. It is like making Majors in Baseball. Come on – rock is in the shitter and now rock journalism too? I am all for freedom of speech (obviously) but Rolling Stone has sold out to sell out magazines. It is one thing to make money but another to capitalize off… Continue Reading

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Snarky Relationship Tips & Advice: Teddy B Style

By on July 15, 2013 in Greatest Hits, Relationships
snarky relationship tips and advice image

My snarky relationship tips come from my experience with Teddy Brewski. He is better than any boyfriend I have had, any day, because I am his one and only. Here is some snarky relationship advice from a woman who has been through enough guys to provide it to you with certain flair. He does what I tell him. (Well, most of the time). If not, I can throw the leash on him and he is always by my side. If I did that to a boyfriend I would probably get arrested (or be into some really, weird S&M craziness which… Continue Reading

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Snarky Dating Tips and Advice: “Slow & Low That is the Tempo”

By on July 11, 2013 in Relationships
snarky dating tips image

Since now I am somewhat of an authority on snarky dating tips and advice, I thought I would make a little cheat sheet for SOME things that have come up a lot in my dating life. Read these tips and commit them to your brain. Keep them handy and if you ever doubt me – don’t. I have been there, done that and am trying to save you from unpleasant experiences people. K? Take my dating advice! When going on a date you should follow this snarky dating advice….. Consider the source and place where you met your date. Dog… Continue Reading

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Working Relationships in Hollywood: Top 12 things I LOL’d on the Boulevard

By on July 8, 2013 in LALA Land, Snarky

Each day, I am privileged to witness very strange relationships in Hollywood– oh LA, LA, land! Reviewing this list it is no wonder why I have so many online dating stories and remain single in the land of the stars. I am always surprised or maybe humorously entertained watching the people up and down the Boulevard. With these kinds of observations wouldn’t you want to live here? Or at least stay for a while? Promise you will never be bored and probably remain single as well. Let’s take a look at the top 12 snarky, funny things I was lucky… Continue Reading

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Worst date idea: 4th of July while shoving your face & doing other unattractive things

By on July 4, 2013 in Relationships

Happy Fourth of July to all of my Melanysguydlines.com readers! Thank you for your support and being the best readers ever! A few dating tips for you on this day of fireworks and bad eating! Always remember to stay snarky. Here are few reasons why the Fourth of July is not the best idea for a first date! Take these guydlines and trust me- I have experience in the dating arena (unfortunately). 1. Don’t ever use the pick up line “You want to make fireworks with me?” unless it is on Twitter because you can get away with saying anything… Continue Reading

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