Top

Subscribe!

Snarky

“Girl Can’t Help It”

Fa la la la la….la..la..la..la! The inundation of Christmas music from every open orifice in the Los Angeles area makes me think of my beginnings in the music business, though it did not always include the jolliest of feelings. When people ask me what I want to do (when I grow up) I still tell them something involving music. No, I do not want to sing the Driedel song or tell you that imaginary Santa is kissing mom under the Christmas tree (cheating? no wonder there are so many confused men in this world because we give them the wrong… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 9

Gentlemen know best

There is one more thing I am thankful for that I just barely touched on with my last post. I want to thank EVERYONE who reads my blog and welcome all of the newcomers, especially the fellas. You guys are representing and make up a large part of my readership. It may come as a surprise to some of you that the majority of my readership is men. It is! **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 20

I am most thankful for…..

  I am THANKFUL for: Being raised by the 2 most amazing people who have been supportive through all my 9 lives and taught me never to be scared of my own shadow. Being blessed to have had a sister that I shared everything with and knowing that she is watching over me every day. Having the strength to kick ass literally and figuratively. **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 10

Trick or Turn Tricks?

Happy Halloween! I love this holiday and it is not because I can dress like a slut. Halloween reminds me of my childhood and good times with my family; carving pumpkins, eating too much candy (that my mom would sort for me, do parents still care?), **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 8

Dating Category – Humper

Hi, my name is Melany, and my dog is a Humper. This is the first time I have been able to admit it. He humps toys, hands, arms, and sides (he has not started with the leg yet). I went to puppy class yesterday and he mounted the front of a Havanese puppy and proceeded to go at her head. Yes, this is embarrassing and I wanted to crawl under the little red slide attached to the playhouse in the dog training room (do dogs really know what to do with a plastic slide?) **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 12

Las Vegas – Rock & Lions

Ahhh, Las Vegas! My third home. I was born in a casino (I wasn’t  but with my innate ability to schlep around the Las Vegas strip, casino, hotels and clubs you would think I was). It is like I was born with a map of the MGM casino in my hand. Well, I Just got back from my trip where I went with the intention to rock out like a maniac for 48 hours straight. This was interrupted by a little bump in the road but I rallied as best I know how to make the trip a success! Put on… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 10

Thanks

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ MY STORIES. PLEASE PASS ALONG!!!! THE ONLY WAY I CAN CONTINUE BEING FUNNY AND WRITING IS IF I CAN START TO MAKE SOME MONEY AT IT. IF NOT, MY PARENTS ARE GOING TO FIRE ME AND THROW ME OUT ON THE STREET. SO PLEASE PASS ALONG TO ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS AND ENEMIES (NO LAW ENFORCEMENT PLEASE). I CAN USE ALL THE HELP I CAN GET!!!! **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 4

Beware of Squeaky!

Ring Ring DAMN! Just missed the phone! My initial reaction is if I don’t know the number, I don’t pick it up. If the person wants to talk, they will leave a message and I can call them back, if I actually want to talk to them. Besides, when I went to grab the phone, somehow I pushed all the buttons at the same time and took a picture of my lap, while raising the phone to my ear and saying hello with no one at the other end (I hate that – dumb I phone). Or dumb me, I am blonde…. Continue Reading

Continue Reading 9

Miss Piggy – Guydline for a better looking USA

Upon returning to Los Angeles from San Francisco via automobile, with Teddy Brewski as co-pilot, a few thoughts popped into my head (there were more than that but don’t want you to know all of them)…. Why does everyone driving long distances look as if they could be relatives of the people from “Fragle Rock”? **Stay snarky my friends!**

Continue Reading 20

First Jackasses in my life – Music lessons

People ALWAYS ask me what I do. My answer is A LOT. But, my background and professional experience is in music. I love music! Music is the soundtrack to my life (it is). I know that sounds cheesy but it is. I have a hard time relating to people if we have different taste in music. I am totally “audio-ly A.D.D.” meaning if the music is not good in a bar, club, at a party, in a supermarket, elevator- I have to leave. I find myself to be one of very few (people with good taste in music) blonde, Jewish… Continue Reading

Continue Reading 2

Send this to a friend